I was taught
to accept the example of Jesus’ ways;
Jesus often
felt betrayed, in his last few days.
Those who
turned against me, I soon forgave,
While I continue
to be the one considered most depraved.
I have long
been persecuted for the manner of my ways.
How long am
I to bear what was, for Jesus, only three days?
It has been
too many years that I have taken the punishment
For the sins
of those who had no pressure to repent.
I’ve stood
between many abusers and their intended prey,
Only to be
told that I’m the one who should be put away.
I am tired
of living in this world of such hypocrisy
I often ask
myself if dying is the only way I’ll ever be free.
It seems to
have worked for Jesus, as he died physically,
Leaving
behind the essence of his great spirituality.
Those who admit
that my strength emboldened them,
May, after
my death, feel that I was truly their friend.
I never
sought to conquer, only to be a part of a team,
But this is
clearly not the message that most of them gleaned.
I am too
strong for most to feel comfortable taking the lead,
But I can no
longer pretend that I’m willing to have no need.
What would Jesus
have done if Peter had stayed awake,
And
convinced Judas, his betrayal plan, to forsake?
Would this
have produced another generation of saviors,
Children of
Jesus, with exemplary human behaviors?
I believe
that, in many ways, Jesus got off rather easy,
Though his
route of death makes most feel quite queasy.
There are
many things that, I believe, are worse than death.
Solidarity
in professed values is what would give me rest.
Who am I to
expect this degree of loyalty,
When even
Jesus was betrayed while in his misery?
I am a
simple human, not born to his superior ancestry;
I am doing the
best I can in what I was sent to be.
I have been
repeatedly told that I should disappear
Before I
negate the memories of those who held me dear.
I am ready
to die, but it appears not my time;
I must now
descend, so that others I love can climb.
Is this the
reason Jesus assented to be crucified;
He knew that
others would not have even tried?
If they
continued to depend on his greater strength,
They’d ignore
the missions on which they had been sent.
Where is my
cross? Where is my tomb?
Even my mother
cursed me from her womb.
I wish not
to live with no mother, father or friend.
My chosen family’s betrayal has become my end.
