Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Post-Motherhood Marriage

The Spirit was never enough for humans, no matter what some believe;
If "God" thought "God" was enough, there would have never been Eve.
Each of us spends our lives looking for complementary human touch;
There is nothing on earth that we intrinsically crave so much.

The problem comes in when our innocence has been destroyed
By those who find the needs of others as reason to be annoyed.
Even if these people, long-ago, had their innocence perverted,
This is not a justification to have, human compassion, deserted.

Sometimes we have to strip our lives down to the naked truths;
My husband and have never had fresh soil in which to take root.
When we met, I had children, and was soon to be a grandmother.
We never had a time when we could truly forsake all others.

I guess this phrase in scripture refers to sexual infidelity;
From other commitments, to build a marriage, we must break free.
Those who continue to prioritize their families of origin,
Against their own marriages, often commit grievous sin.

Once we are grown, ready to create our own families,
It takes a great deal of focus to create who WE will be.
Those who continue to cling desperately to rules from their pasts
Will have a more difficult time making their own families last.

My husband has been most gracious as I affected a "do over".
I'm quite sure that I was a better granny than a mother.
All the children for whom he put aside his own desires
Have let us know, forcefully, their need for us has expired.

I have let friends know that we are setting new priorities;
Some have accused me of thinking only of ME.
This is probably true; for the first time since I was four,
I have all these choices. I have to choose which door.

My husband spends his days fulfilling his dreams
I have no primary responsibilities, it now seems.
I write because I feel a strong calling to do so;
It's for the pleasure of exchanging ideas, not my ego.

If I could have my fantasy life come completely true,
I'd live in the way that I've read some used to do:
Collecting a salon of philosophers, and artists,
I would then always have growth in our midst.

We would offer them fabulous food and libation,
In exchange for frequent access to their creations.
We would still enjoy a sacred day, for only us;
All the gifts of the past week, we could then discuss.

Parents who've lost touch with each other focusing on progeny
Have new access to adventures when their children break free.
How many of us give up, just when we can reclaim the fun
On which our combined journey through life was begun?