Saturday, August 16, 2014

Kill the Killers and Leave Our Children Alone

If the suicides of several of our favorite funny men teaches us only one thing, it should be that men are in great pain, while pretending that they are having fun. They have been taught, from before birth, that real men don't cry or show weakness in the front of others. This is because they are expected to live in a world where homo sapiens act like simple-minded animals, and they are treated as such. They know that any show of weakness is an invitation to predators to finish them off. Maddeningly, the biggest bullies often including their own fathers and other adult authority figures.

Why do women continue to bear children with men who have proven themselves to be such bullies and inhuman beasts? Isn't it time that we teach our sons that we want them in the house with us, not out defending themselves against all the bullies who line up against them? Isn't it time that we shut our doors, hearts, spirit, arms, and legs to homo sapiens who act as wild beasts?

I abhor adults who make themselves more powerful in the eyes of others by ridiculing those different than they are, especially when the victim of ridicule has no defense against the bully. A child is not supposed to be an adult in any way; they are to be protected and taught by example until they are ready to cut the ties from those who have protected and guided them. This is the gift and the challenge of human parenting; the more human we want our children to become, the longer it takes before they are ready to stand on their own.

Only the children know when they reach this point, and it is often in a boomerang manner, hoping to get what they needed from us, or others, before they left the first time (...and the second, and the third...). Often they are angry that they don't find all that they want in our nests; this is when very strong friendships with other well-grounded adults come into play for us. The most blessed parents are those who have this kind of friendship with their parenting partners.

I have found it extremely important in my family life to have very well-defined rules for what we allow in our home. Children will all attempt to break those boundaries down by dragging in every manner of stray. Even the strays are expected to step in line with the rules of the family. To allow otherwise actually weakens the trust the children have that you are strong enough to protect them.

Teenagers, like infants, are supposed to be somewhat narcissistic.  The big difference is that, with years of example and empowerment from committed, compassionate parents, teenagers can begin to choose where to invest their human potential and efforts. Too often, especially in men, I see a tendency to act as teenagers again just as their sons and daughters so greatly need them to be strong adults. In women, I often see the tendency to want to be princesses rather than step to the plate as full adult managers of their own homes and families. If we are parents, we are no longer "girls" or "one of the boys." It is our jobs to put the needs of our family and the community that helps us support them above what we want (and sometimes above what we need).

The play at feeling no pain as we kill our own children and ourselves must end! It is time to stop playing at being royalty, creating chaos with endless wars. We must all act as committed, compassionate adults at the appropriate ages. Either we choose this path, or risk being treated as nothing other than wild animals threatening our defined home boundaries. I am in favor of mercifully killing all who have no ability or intent to act as full humans, as I would treat a pack of wild hyenas attacking my children and home. Drones seem to be good for this, killing the wild beasts while protecting the children and their homes.