Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Unwanted Infants

I am the unwanted infant whose mothers had no joy in their eyes.
I am the child who was rejected when every child should be prized.
I am the child who is so needy that I will do almost anything to be held.
I am the child in whom fear of abandonment always dwells.

I am a mother who struggled to give my children a safe place,
Not having an internal well of community and spiritual grace.
I am a person who still struggles for a reason to continue to live,
Now that nobody seems to want or need what I have to give.

I speak out for all the vulnerable, as if it were my pain;
It feels so very painful, as if the rejection is mine again.
The grief for others I mirror becomes too much for them,
And, once again, I've used up the compassion of a friend.

I hurt for every child not loved while being conceived;
Those born to the selfish are those for whom I grieve.
Some have babies for their religions, some for status;
These are child abuses that we don't often discuss.

Children do not, to their own conception, consent;
"God" does not dictate to whom children are sent.
We use our animal bodies, without Sacred Spirits;
As the child's unloved soul dies, nobody will hear it.

When a mother's soul is dead through addiction or depression,
The child feels the deadening as his or her own rejection.
Fear, too, is experienced by a child as rejection or rage;
For another generation of fear and anger, this sets the stage.

Jesus had no soldiers; we need no soldiers for the true Christ;
To continue converting followers through fear is a great vice.
We must stop forcing children on those who cannot love them;
To lead a child to despair and rage is the greatest human sin.