Friday, September 21, 2012

Breaking the Bonds of Blindness

Until I was almost sixty, I lived in La-La land, believing that all was right in my own home. As long as I could make it home and close the door on the outside world, I could be safe with my babies under my wings. Any perceived threat to the safety of my children, physically or morally, was banished. I wouldn't even watch the news for fear that the outside world would infect my children's innocence.

Several threats of death in family and close friends awakened me. I came home and reconnected with my family and friends in a fully awakened state, believing that I was strong enough to face long-denied truths. All my years of denial had created a type of emotional blindness in me -- sort of like, I suppose, living in a cave would do for one's physical eyes. The truth did not set me free; in fact, it almost killed me and may have killed relationships with several of my friends and my family.

I want so badly to believe that we can achieve peace on earth and that we can break the horrible human cycle of jealousy and competition that began with the first humans that I had convinced myself that this world existed in my family and friends. How horrible it was for me to find out that my family and friends are as flawed as the outside world. What great grief I have experienced coming to understand that not all people are willing or able to break with the patterns inherited from their parents.

Must "Christians" act as "soldiers of Christ" with all the accompanying anger and competitiveness? Can't we simply spread the solace of The Spirit? Can't we share harmony simply -- with a smile, a hug, and a bit of compassion, without being ridiculed and persecuted for our passivity and naivete?

I do have a home with harmony, but it can be lonely at times. Is there such a thing as "emotional cataracts" to help dim the light of outside reality?

1 comment:

  1. I guess I am fortunate, I found peace a few years ago, and learned to accept others warts and all.